So. Yesterday, I got a message from a vampire. Go ahead. Scream, squeal, giggle, and swoon. I'll wait. Done? Great. As I was saying....a vampire. More squealing? Alright....get it out of your system. Done? You sure? Lovely. VAMPIRE!!! Ah, good. You weren't lying. Either that or you're out of energy from the first two episodes.

My original point was....hell, I forgot. Oh, right...a vampire. His name is most likely familiar to you. Don Henrie. *sigh* Go ahead. I'll wait. NOW are you quite finished? Oh, goodie. I think you damaged my ear drums that time.

Now that we have THAT unpleasantness out of the way, it's my turn. He's literate! Whoamygod he's LITERATE!! *fangirly squeal* Except not so much. It's a pleasing discovery to have made, but come on now. He's just a guy.

Ladies: he's just a guy.
Guys: he's just a guy.

At least, I think so. So he drinks blood. Big deal. I like my steaks cooked just enough that they don't walk off the plate.

I respect him. I didn't respect the "vampires" that littered school hallways. You know, the ooooh-beware-my-acrylic-fangs-or-I-will-bite-you-or-stab-you-with-my-eyelinger variety. No respect. No intelligence to respect.

This one has brains to spare. He also has a habit of telling people what to do. I have a habit of not listening to people.

Anyway. The point of this is just to ask a few simple questions....the most burning of which is WHY?? Why? Why why WHY?!? What makes him so fantastically special and worthy of hero-worship? Tell me! I want to know. Why does everything with a vagina between the ages of fourteen and forty-nine want to jump his bones and bear his children? What the hell is WRONG with you?

Are people REALLY that desperate? Come on! Is it the looks? He's not the only good-looking man in the world! Is it the brains? He's not the only smart man in the world! Is it the fame? What does that change? Famous people are just PEOPLE. No different from others! If you claim you're in love/lust/like with him, tell me...why?

I have only once claimed to like someone famous. We're good friends now, with no chance of anything more, and that's alright....but it's not the point. The point is, when I liked him....when I discovered I wasn't just starstruck...that was when I threw my arms around my best friend and said "Why couldn't he be an accountant?" into her shoulder.

It was selfish. I know. But I didn't want him to be a rock star. I didn't want him to be rich and famous and adored by millions. I just wanted him. That was all.

I am immensely proud to call him my friend. Because he is. He is a WONDERFUL friend to have and I love him with all my heart. Him. Not his makeup. Not his band. Not his music. Not his singing. Him. For his perviness. For loving hockey. For betting on the Super Bowl.

But I digress. All I wanted to know was....why? Tell me....your thoughts, opinions. Flames welcome. I want to know how you feel and why you feel it. It makes no sense to me. So enlighten me. Please.